There is a really big difference between being alone and being lonely. Sometimes a person can feel the loneliest in a crowded room surrounded by people. Sometimes a person in a partnership relationship can feel like the are all alone on a deserted island. Feeling lonely really doesn’t have that much to do with being around people.
Being alone is different. Some people have a really hard time being alone. Some people can’t do it at all. I know many grown adults that if their partner goes away overnight will pack it up and go stay at a friend’s house.
It is so important to be able to be alone. It doesn’t have to be a lot but a person needs to feel comfortable enough in their own skin to be by themselves completely and still be at peace.
Are you able to be alone? I actually like being alone. I can be totally content staying home by myself to putter around and do my own thing,
It didn’t used to be that way at all. I felt “better”, “safer”, “calmer”, however yu want to describe it if someone was around. I didn’t even need to be right next to that person. They could be in a room with the door closed but just knowing they were there, made me feel better.
Then due to life craziness and parenting three children by myself, I needed to address my own issues. I needed to make myself whole so I could be there for my children. It is amazing how children can motivate us to change just based on the love that we have for them.
As far as loneliness, I had to address that too. I think the loneliest time of my life was being in a relationship that wasn’t good for me. Here I was with a partner but I felt like it was me against the world.
It is actually a good barometer of a relationship. If you feel alone more than you feel like are connected, than it is a flag. Now that I am in the right relationship, I never feel lonely. I know in my heart and soul that I am not alone anymore.
The irony of it all is one has to learn how to be at peace with being alone before they can really find a relationship where they will not be lonely!
Sounds funny to write but it really is true.
Now think about your own life and your own alone and loneliness barometer. Take a moment to think about i you need to make adjustments. This one reflection might be the beginning of major change in your life.
image from: https://tapestrysb.files.wordpress.com/2013/03/alone4.jpg